Normalizing Therapy

Lets talk about seeking professional help

There is a certain degree of taboo that comes along with seeking a “shrink”, a psychologist, a psychiatrist or a counsellor. It is often frowned upon and looked down as weakness by those who don’t have much knowledge or awareness of Mental Health. In certain third world countries like the Philippines, we are extremely backwards in terms of educating the masses on what Mental Health is along with other many progressive concepts like LGBTQ rights, abortion, proper sex education, and divorce. Seeking professional help is never considered a weakness, it is actually a strength. It takes more courage to ask for help than to live in denial of your current issues or problems. Seeking professional advice from a psychologist or psychiatrist will help you cope with grief in a healthy way, to process and uncover painful traumas from your past and shed light on ways to properly address these issues. People are doomed to repeat negative patterns and cycles with the same people until they realize that their actions root from trauma, fear, pain and anger. It is this awareness of your limitations and shortcomings which requires you to take good hard look at yourself and take accountability for the aspects of yourself that you need to work on. This awareness is what will push you to reach your goals and make you into the best possible version of yourself. To “Know Thyself”is the greatest power of all.

What people don’t realize is that COVID -19 is not only a major health crisis, it is also a Mental Health crisis. It affects millions of people with sadness, loneliness, hoplessness, paranoia, fear, and anger. Many are undiagnosed and untreated from serious mental health conditions like Anxiety Disorders, Mood Disorders and Clinical Depression to name a few. This also affects the Mental Health of the people around them like their family and their children. Mankind is collectively suffering silently from this pandemic with mental health conditions. There is pent up anger and hostility over people’s loss of income, death of loved ones, injustices in society and the incompetence of our elected officials. There are many news reports of flight attendants being assaulted, people losing their jobs and even elders committing suicide from hopelessness. Media often fails to capture the gravity of unemployment and the direct relationship it has to suicide as elections draw near. Apart from that children also suffer from mental health issues from the stress of online learning, cyberbullying and social isolation.

These are not normal times, so it is helpful to be kind and considerate to other people. Think twice before judging other people because you don’t know their struggles or what they are going through. How do you know when you need to see a psychologist? A good rule of thumb is that when you can no longer accomplish daily functions like going to work, daily hygiene, and are having drastic weight fluctuations or appetite changes you should get help. Another sign is that you can no longer function because intrusive negative thoughts or habits are interfering with how you interact with the world. Other signs to look out for are extreme social isolation, lack of sleep, not speaking to friends or family for days or weeks at a time, and not leaving your bed or doing the hobbies you once enjoyed. When Clinical Depression is severe, another symptom is feeling detached from your body and numbness in your legs or face. This is a major sign that what you are feeling is no longer as what people casually call “sad”, “depressed” or “the blues” but is in fact severe clinical depression and bordering on disassociation or psychosis. The difference between clinical depression and “sadness” or being “depressed” is of utmost importance. Being sad or “depressed” is a passing mood whereas Clinical Depression and Major Depressive Disorder are diagnosed by professionals and are needed to be treated through medication or talk therapy and ned to be treated for a lifetime. The use of language in distinguishing sadness as passing mood versus a serious medical disorder of Clinical Depression or major Depressive Disorder is crucial to give Mental Health survivors the proper dignity and support they need. Clinical Depression is not a trend, it is not attention seeking, it’s not something you snap out of, it’s not “acting like a victim” and it is certainly not an excuse. It is a serious medical condition and should be treated as one.

Let’s be honest, how often can you call your best friend or even your mother over the same issues without feeling like a burden? Or maybe you feel like your friend group just doesn't understand you. You can only keep repeating, “I feel so low.. or I feel sad today because..” so many times, and often people will not know what to say. You still won’t feel seen, validated or understood by individuals who lack the empathy or personal experience to relate to your struggle. The fact of the matter is that people are generally unqualified to perform psychological first aid or dissect your psychological problems to the extent a professional counsellor, psychologist or psychiatrist can. There are too many people who give general, broad, toxic positivity advice which are not useful in any way. How often gave you heard the, “It’s all in your head”, “ But you’re so lucky..” or “Focus on the positive” regurgitated lines? It doesn't help in any way and it invalidates your suffering on so many levels. Your pain, sadness and grief is valid regardless of your social status. Clinical Depression, Anxiety and other Mental Health concerns affect all people regardless of age, gender, social class or job title not just the rich. The reason so many people commit suicide is the lack of awareness on Mental Health and the lack of a real support system from peers. Often, a professional is needed to process trauma, yet people hesitate to get the treatment they need due to the stigma surrounding getting a psychiatrist or psychologist and Mental Health. Ironically, Mental Health professionals are in extremely high demand. The waitlist for child psychologists and adult psychologists can reach several months to a year. Everyone suffers, and seeking therapy is a lot more common than you think.

The difficulty with struggling from a Mental Health condition is that it is invisible to the human eye. It is a lonely, quiet, and often painful journey that other’s rarely get a glimpse of. Unless you have an extremely supportive family or a good support system, you will suffer alone in silence without getting the professional help you need. Clinical Depression, Anxiety and other Mental Health issues affect everyone. It can affect high profile businessmen, glamorous celebrities, blue collar workers, and even the elderly. Many people put on masks every single day to those around them but are secretly suffering. You really never know what a person is going through. The best thing you can do is remain kind and considerate to other people and be respectful of their journey.

Ending the stigma of Mental Health is crucial now more than ever during this post apocalyptic health crisis. When you get a major burn or get your ribs broken you go to a doctor who specializes in such. The same way if you are feeling isolated from others due to grief, anxiety or you are feeling suicidal then you see a psychologist or psychiatrist. Professional psychologists, psychiatrists or grief counsellors help you to unclutter your mind and to process your trauma. Let’s normalize seeking therapy and #breakthestigma surrounding Mental Health. These are the conversations that matter and that can save lives.

“Knowing others is intelligence, knowing yourself is true wisdom.” – Lao-Tzu

Namaste