Pretty Privilege
Pretty privilege is a societal phenomena wherein those who are deemed “attractive” are also automatically assumed to be more trustworthy and kind. Whether or not we admit that we are In fact biased towards more attractive people- has been proven by various psychological studies. Attractive individuals including men, get preference in the job hunt, when dating the opposite sex and just treated nicer in general. Attractive women on the other hand can often take advantage of looks in order to climb the corporate ladder and find shortcuts to the top.
It’s essential that before you get too involved with men or women who are “a 10” and seem perfect, to really dig deeper than superficial looks. If a person is too good to be true, it’s probably not true. Especially when one constantly toots their own horn on social media. As i’ve grown older, my definition of “attractiveness” has changed. I’ve come to realize that players whether girls or guys, often lack empathy and are self centered to the point of being a narcissist. It’s also important to prioritize personality, values and character in people and not just attractiveness. I believe in getting to know a person’s soul rather than how good they would be for your image or on paper. You don’t need to be too starstruck for every handsome guy or pretty girl that crosses your path. Take time to actually know people because more often than not, many pretty or handsome individuals have terrible personalities, lack emotional depth or aren’t very kind or empathetic individuals. Since it’s very easy for attractive men and women to attract the opposite sex, many of them don’t feel the need to work on themselves either.
That being said, pretty/ handsome privilege opens doors. They are the ones chosen for commercials and print ads. They get special treatment even if they failed a subject cause they’re “cute”. They can talk their way out of traffic tickets multiple times. Some get past bouncers with ease or are born into wealth. These kinds of individuals make you remember that the world is not fair and they usually amass a plethora of haters for all the handouts and special favors life has given them.
I am aware I am to a degree attractive and I don’t mean to brag. I get compliments about my looks and I appreciate that. But the ones I remember are non physical like “you’re real” or “you’re authentic”. I think these are the kinds of values society should value over looks and being “pretty”. Anyone can be born with great ass or tits but at the end of the day, we all age and all that will be left is your personality, character and sense of humor.
Lastly, on pretty privilege i’ve read through my research that “pretty privilege” is actually very isolating. You tend to stir up hate and animosity among other men or women. Old friends have a tendency to try to drag you down because they can’t handle their own jealousy or hate with your happiness or success. It can be lonely in it’s own way, even when you have plenty of friends. Knowing you’ve been burned in the past makes you extra vigilant with your secrets and you can’t lower your guard down. Another problem with pretty/ handsome privilege is that the people or friends that love you, put you on a pedestal like you can do no wrong. When you do make a mistake, they hold it against you twice as hard simply cause of the said pedestal from pretty privilege. Lastly many will want you to fail and take pleasure in it- also known as “Schadenfreude”.
In conclusion, pretty/ handsome and even rich privilege is really a frustrating phenomenon in work, school, in voting for officials, in dating, and in pretty much everything we do. We can’t really handle the unfairness of the world, but we can change ourselves and our reactions towards other people. For example, we don’t need to backstab or gossip about our attractive friends or engage in celebrity gossip. I personally don’t like the feeling of gossiping, cause it lowers my vibration and makes me feel dirty, like i’ve rolled in mud. It also seems to be a waste of time on my end. We can always choose to think and speak positive thoughts. Positive thoughts and words makes us feel good about ourselves and spreads good vibrations to others. We can also be mindful of how influencers or celebrities make us feel when we scroll on social media. If others make us feel insecure or unhappy with ourselves, you can always mute or block them. Life is too short to be hung up on random people on the Internet or celebs who are more beautiful or more successful than us. If you have a couple of genuine friends that make you laugh, a nice cozy home to call your own and a family that loves you, you are more blessed than you think. Stay grateful. Remember: 1. Beauty fades 2. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
“It is only with the heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye” - The Little Prince